Monday, April 18, 2005

today, as any literate individual who has read my previous post would be able to conclude, is my first day of school. and i obviously survived it to bring to you yet another pingccentric post. the class was made up of such a motley crew. i spied with my little eye - . feeling trendy ngee ann mass comm type rejects . quiet, mousy types [girls] . two mat-like boys . the feeling i'm da man, i'm so hawt dude. not hot and not my kind of 'da man' at the very least. and a few other types that would contain some racial slurs and we wouldn't be wanting that here now, would we? lesson of the day was economics. i learnt - that luxembourg is the world's richest country. - about macro and microeconomics. - that in all my almost-quite-soon-to-be 19 years, i have amassed zero social and interpersonal skills whatsoever. allow me to elaborate on the last point. in short, the break was painful. awkward and strange and uncomfortable for me. groups/cliques were starting to form. people were going up to each other to introduce themselves. except me. honest to goodness, i did not mean to come off as stand offish or even snobbish. i just didn't have it in me to go up to someone to say hi. i can get that painfully shy. i was groaning inwards as the lecturer stressed the importance of group projects. knack for social interaction? [do not check.] patience to deal with other people for extended lengths of time? [do not check.] ability to be open and receptive to ideas? [do not check.] afterall, what if the other party was unresponsive? what kind of questions does one ask that allows one to express genuine interest in the other person yet remain non-invasive and polite? i honestly loathe and dread such social situations. being taught to interact with older people all my life has done nothing for me when it comes to my peers. small wonder i don't make friends easily. all was salvaged when the girls behind me struck up conversation, as did the quiet, mousy girl i was sharing the table with. i was even offered a piece of chocolate! which i graciously accepted, not wanting to seem like one of those thin-ish girls who stay that way by not eating. yet, i was beside myself worrying if there would be chocolate stuck to my teeth. overwhelming neuroses are not my idea of fun at all. but at the end of the lesson conducted by a jovial and animated lecturer named peggy, email addresses were exchanged and new friends were made. tomorrow would definitely be much better, i know it.

the textual siege.

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